Regulator Gazette---January 1897

 

Headline--Lady Regulators Battle Bank Robbers From The Future

Lady Regulators Missalot Missy and Slopoke were guarding the First National Regulator Bank when all of a sudden there was a flash of light akin to lightning.   Appearing in the street in front of the bank was a strange vehicle which moved around without horses and had a gun mounted on the top which fired faster than any Gatling gun anyone had seen.  After shooting up the main street four fellows wearing funny suits and packing shooting irons like the ladies had never seen  headed to the front door of the bank.  Little did they know that the ladies were waiting for them with ole timey shotguns.  The ladies took out the first four robbers and put the rest of the bad boys running for cover.  When the ladies had exhausted their pistol ammo Missalot retrieved one of the robbers weapons.   It was labeled Colt AR-15.  Missalot told Slopoke that if Colt made it then she could shoot it and with that proceeded to double-tap the remainer of the bad boys from the future.  Just as quickly as they appeared, the robbers bodies, their vehicle and all their weapons dissappeared. 

 

Headline--Mad Dog Robs Assay Office

It was a quiet Sunday morning when Mad Dog snuck into town and went around to the back of the Assay Office.  He peeked through the new curtains and saw two guards asleep in front of the wood stove.  He stuck his trusty shotgun through the window and took care of the two guards.  He then ran over to the back room window and blasted five more guards.  He then kicked in the door and proceeded to the safe and bagged the gold which was inside.  Just as he finished loading his bag the relief guards showed up for work and five shots later the first shift of guards were officially off duty--for good.  He then ran outside mounted his horse Nellie and proceeded out of town.  Before he got too far with his heavy load of gold a citzen posse caught up with him only to be turned back with ten rounds from Mad Dogs rifle.  A reward has been offered for Mad Dog but so far-- no takers.....

 

The first Cowboy match of the year was a big hit....Especially since we had two lady Regulators in the posse.  We got to shoot weapons from the future, throw tomahawks from the past, shoot swinging targets with the rifle and a bunch of other foolishnish as usual. Next months match should be a good one as we are seasoning a fresh batch of cowpies for some type contest and we may figure out a way to use the new 400 yard range for a buffalo shoot.....

 

Results for January--Seniors: Winner was Roderdel with Idaho Spud and Doc Clock in tow.

                               Ladies:  Missalot Missy followed closely by Slopoke.

                               First Flight: Dick Holliday, Gunsmoke (Still having gun problems)and 

                                                 Dynamite Dan

                               Second Flight: Mad Dog, Duplin Kid, and Slowhand

 

As always there was equipment traded around and everybody had everything need to shoot...so if you want to play with us just come on out with what you've got and we'll try to help with the rest.  After Gunsmokes gun misfired a couple of times i think he wished he had borrowed a gun, but then his reloads probably wouldn't have gone off.  Come on out and we promise a good time......Take a kid shooting......Respectfully submitted--Ned Bluntline