| Regulator Gazette February 15, 1897 Saint Valentines Day Massacre Destroys Saloon Sign Deacon Dave had just been jilted by his best girl (Carbine Nora) and had gone to the Bleeding Heart Saloon to drown his sorrows. After having a couple of dozen shots of Old Croak he was in no mood for any Valentines Day tomfoolery. Light Loafers Leroy went over to Dave and asked if he could be his Valentine and after busting Light Loafers jaw Dave yelled "I've got your Valentine right here" and produced his ..44. You know, that steel heart had hung over the bar as long as anybody could remember and Deacon was about to change that. Dave took his crossdraw pistol and put five rounds right in the center of the heart. Before the smoke cleared, he whipped out the other .44 and put five more rounds in it. The sound of that steel heart being hit with the .44's was as loud as any blacksmiths anvil you've ever heard. Ole Light loafers was just getting off the floor when Dave racked the lever on his rifle and put five more rounds into the heart. The last round was too much for the steel heart and it fell from it's perch and hit ole Light Loafers right in the head. Dave felt so bad about the incident (after sobering up) that he has reconciled with Light Loafers Leroy and Sheriff Holliday was said to have seen them riding off into the sunset together. Deacon Dave Wins Buntline Poker Tournament (That Deacon Dave sure is getting a lot of press this month). As the Regulators were having trouble finding an honest dealer for the annual poker tournament, Sheriff Holliday came up with a foolproof method to do away with dealing off the bottom of the deck. Why not do away with the dealer altogether???? Since we all know that the Sheriff makes the rules (usually so he can win), the posse decided to see what he came up with. His answer to the dealing problem was to put all the cards on a board in a big square configuration and let you shoot your five card hand. When the smoke cleared from the poker game the results were as follows.....Blacksmith had three queens, Tom Two Times had two pair, Little Mix had two pair, Idaho Spud had three nines, Col Case Hardin had one pair, Dick Holliday had a full house of Aces and Jacks, but Deacon shot out 4 nines to take the pot. Lucious Louise had a nice pair but was disqualified as she didn't shoot.....I hope the Cowgirls ain't read'n this....
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